The Sun hasn't been out in like 3 days. What a difference that makes on someone like me, I love the feel of it's energy. Although, I can say that the sun feels different in other parts of the world. It feels different in Portugal, it feels different in Miami and it definitely feels different here.
I was born and raised and live in Newark... but I am not of Newark. Maybe that's why I always felt stuck here. As a freedom loving Aquarius Moon Child, I will never function at 100% where I feel stuck.
Here comes Pluto for the next 20 years... just blowing into my sign all guns blazing. If I signal him, he will fuck everything up, burn it to the ground, pulvarize it into dust.. and go... Here, no more of that shit. That's what you wanted right?
This is all happening high on my chart.
Pluto can be very destructive, but I am a true Aquarius and Saturn the father of discipline runs it all there 24/7. Pluto is going to have to pump the brakes, let's talk this through before you go flying your dragon everywhere and burning villages. What I need from Pluto in Aquarius from the next 20 years, is to be Brave... Gravatas. Pluto gives Power to destroy things, so I have to learn to wield that power and channel it into Work... Into Writing. Into Selling. Into Learning More. When all of these things are flowing, in a fruitful and positive way, that is when I will feel the power.
The whole key is to not be ruthless. With ourselves, with other people.
It's been a tremendous 3 years since my father passed away. I want to step back into life as gently as possible but with Pluto there is always Chaos. It's gonna be there and I'm going to have to just accept it. I think as long as you have a pretty good understanding of who you and you already know what your weakness are... then you are good. Now when my weaknesses pop up, I acknowledge them, I hug them and I say to myself, "Now there is something I need to work on." No need to pretend they don't exist anymore..... Yes, I have a bad temper. It's hard to not take the stupid things people do personally for me. If could be the lady cutting me off on the highway... it could be my mom repeating herself a million times about how my hair looks better like and like that. Why didn't it take me so long to learn that it's not about me? I wish I could have learned this in school.
Back to Pluto.
I appreciate you. I want to use you, not you use me. I feel your presence in Aquarius already...and it's only 1 degree. Pretty soon you will all the way moved into my house.. and you will stay for 20 years. I'll give you the nice and big guestroom and you can chill. I'll call on your sword when needed but just fall back. I already have my moon, mercury and Sun there.... plus my Midheaven. As he moves through my sign in the next 20 years he will cross over my 3 planets and those are the times I will have to pay attention to my horoscope. I just want him to be comfortable on his visit...He's free to roam but I'll call u, don't call me. Even if you see someone yelling at me and shit, I just need you to fall back.. I got this.
While Pluto is here visiting my house I will call on him to help with my listening. Less Talking. When he goes over my Mercury in Aquarius is when I'll light a blue candle to have him help me there. Instead of explosions like he likes... Saturn will be with me to teach me to be Nice, Sweet, Caring...to everyone. I already know how to do that with the people i love, to do this with everyone shouldn't be difficult as long as i stay true to myself and be honest. I don't know how to fake it, this will involve me taking down all the old structures. People are hurting out there, empathy is scarce. I have red flags and they usually involve pointing my finger @ people or the whisper in my ear, judging. I know now, that if I change, so will my world
That doesn't mean I have to be a punk bitch though. I will be here with Pluto and my Queen of Swords.... listening better, working on my weaknesses and accepting them more.. being brave, believing in myself more. The other day I said to someone that my life was boring. I've been through so much trauma that saying that wasn't a bad thing. It just means that everything is calm. I wish I had more to say when people ask me what's going on. Oh nothing.. Just hanging in there and hoping for something better. I have to start being better. I'm not going to beat myself up because I've come a long way but I know there is room for improvement. It means keeping myself in a positive mindset and making sure I only keep people around me who I know genuinely love me.
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